Advice and brief Chuck reaction

[rivkat]

Received invitation today to do a recorded interview with a person who nearly makes my eardrums bleed with irritation. It’s my field and would be good exposure, but maturity sometimes consists of saying no to things with a high chance of going wrong, correct? You know how sometimes you just get a sense that a man does not take women as seriously as he takes men? I am convinced that he’s one of those, and there’s this tone in his voice that I can only hear as condescension. Am I being foolish in not gathering my calm and doing battle in a public forum?

Chuck: This is why you shouldn’t keep Ellie out of the loop, folks. My long overdue SPN/Chuck crossover will definitely feature Ellie’s big, big brain.

Comments

[darkemeralds]

I think it depends entirely on your confidence in your own ability to think on your feet. Me? I'd turn it down in the absolute certainty of being rendered an idiot: I can't think on my feet, I'm slow to formulate my thoughts, and ten times slower when someone needles me or pings my privilege/condescension radar.

On the other hand, if you're good at that, it might be awesome to take the guy down a peg in a public forum!

[cathexys]

No, you are so not!!!

when my feminist spidey senses are kicking in, I move away fast!!!

[brownbetty]

I would probably do it, but not because it's my Feminist Duty, or even necessarily because I expect I'd strike a blow for feminism, but because when my back gets up, I come out swinging, whether or not it's helpful.

Which is to say, you know if it's right for you; trust yourself.

[rivkat]

Here's the big risk: because for me this will be part zillion of encounters, I risk coming off as the shrill, unreasonable one--the way any ongoing dispute might seem if you pop in on the middle of it.

But I am being overly risk-averse, perhaps. It's not like I don't like a fight! I just don't want to walk in on something sure to fail.

[abbylee]

That sounds like a lot of negatives. What's the positives of doing it?

(Aka, I think your gut is saying no and you should trust it, but maybe that's not what you're saying.)

[rivkat]

That's a good question! The positives are exposure to a fair number of people who might not otherwise hear my message, and the real question is whether I trust myself to stay lively on my feet while squashing down my instinctive negative reaction to this guy. My gut is indeed saying no, but it may be saying no in that "I don't want to take that disgusting medicine" way where it can't see the longterm benefit.

[abbylee]

To me, especially with the way you're talking about it, that sounds like the kind of thing you should only do if you've got a drive for a goal. If you're feeling guilty about not reaching a more diverse audience, spend the time that you would have spent on this interview researching a way to reach part of that audience in another way. But it sounds like it's not even one of your goals, just something you feel like it should be a goal.

Skipping out on this interview, saying no to an opportunity? I'm definitely falling on the side of "maturity sometimes consists of saying no to things with a high chance of going wrong". Pick your battles :D

[rothesis]

The positives sound nice, but I am a big proponent of trusting your instincts. If something in you says this has a high chance of going wrong, listen to your gut.

[vito_excalibur]

but maturity sometimes consists of saying no to things with a high chance of going wrong, correct?

I have so much trouble trying to figure that one out. I mean, it makes sense, and you can't do everything; OTOH, what if it means you're just not trying hard enough? :/